Sunday, April 16, 2006

Ewe's Not Fat, Ewe's Fluffy

My grandma used to have that saying on her wall up home on the sheep farm.

Anyway, I was hopping around my blogroll the other day & happened upon
this post by SWWBO on weight.

I am fat (hate that word), the same clothing size she is. (A couple clients once said that I have 'black hips' and assured me that was a compliment. Not quite sure if I trust them.)

SWWBO brings up why she is overweight. I have to say that many of her reasons are the same as mine.

I have fibromyalgia, which combines lots of fun symptoms like chronic fatigue sydrome, insomnia (those 2 go together real well), vertigo and joint pain. Trust me, it's difficult to go out & exercise when you have pain shooting from your ankles all the way up to your hips & back and back down again. It's also difficult when you get severe spasms zinging through your knees when you try to jog. (Running your knees into 55-gallon barrels, pipe fences & telephone poles at a dead run on horseback ain't fun.) Add in a bad back and ... yeah.

I did the workout thing for a while. I had a membership at Curves and went 3-5 times each week. I also kinda followed the Weight Watchers program. Didn't lose a thing. Oh I'd drop 5 pounds or an inch or two, but the next time I was weighed & measured it would be back, plus a few more. I had a terrible time eating all of the WW points I was supposed to. I do have a tendency to forget to eat sometimes. I'll suddenly realize I'm dizzy & shaky and haven't eaten for 18 or more hours.

My schedule at work, the baby-sitting & other miscellaneous stuff I have to do keep me pretty much in a state of exhaustion all the time. With the insomnia, I'll get so run down that the basics become a monumental effort, let alone going out for even a walk.

Yes, I need to take better care of myself. Bridget's always saying I'm going to kill myself if I keep going at the same rate. There are
studies out saying that if you are sleep deprived, you are more likely to gain/keep weight. I average anywhere from 2-6 hours each day, sometimes on the weekends I'll take several sleeping pills to get a full 8 hours. Lately I've had several days of 1-2 hours of sleep each.

I do think that, to a certain extent, it is genetically pre-disposed. I am built just like Mom's side of the family. (I wish I could switch Dad's nose for Mom's & vice versa with the build. Well, not his build, but his family's skinniness.)

I did lose 30lbs one summer when I worked at Cessna. I was putting in 90-100 hours each week in an un-air-conditioned factory (way over 100 degrees). I would usually eat a sandwich or apple on my way to work at 3 in the morning, live on Mountain Dew until lunch, then eat a half pack of those sandwich crackers at noon for lunch. I'd usually grab something from a drive-thru on the way home after a 12-16 hour day. It was during that time that I burned out for the 2nd time and ended up in the ER several times for the vertigo.

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