I've found a new way to terrorize the kids at work. I just tell them that I haven't turned my TV on for several months, don't listen to (c)rap music & have never been on a date. Heh. One girl's eyes got so big I thought they were going to fall clean outta her head.
Oh yeah, I also got one of those el cheapo flying monkey toys that have rubber bands in their arms & make a really annoying & loud screeching sound. Great for pestering them until they decide to crawl out of bed. Plus it doesn't give me that headache I get when I do a really bad, really loud off-key opera version of "On Top of Spaghetti".